two types of people

The University of Chicago is known (among other things, of course) for their creative questions on their college application. One of them is, 

 "Dog and Cat. Coffee and Tea. Great Gatsby and Catcher in the Rye. Everyone knows there are two types of people in the world. What are they?"

I'm not 18, but if I were asked this question today, I could answer, "Considerate shoppers and inconsiderate ones."  And even better, I could break down each into subgroups. Although the subgroups are not mutually exclusive.

First, the Considerates.

There are:

The Appreciative Ones
They're the ones who take time to mention when you've chosen something for them that they wouldn't have found otherwise. And they never walk away from the dressing room (whether they bought something or not) without seeking you out to say thank you.


The Well-Brought Up Ones
They always leave the dressing room neat. All the clothes are neatly hung. 



The Best Ones
These include both categories above. Plus — they buy a lot and rarely return (clothes, that is). 


Then There are the Others. The Inconsiderate Ones. 



The Rude Ones
They treat the sales associates as personal slaves. They never thank us. They ask for tons of sizes and colors in multiple items, then buy none of them. Their dressing rooms reflect their rudeness. Clothes inside-out in piles on the floor. Nothing hung. And, if you see them on the sales floor and ask if you can help them, they totally ignore you.



The Non-Shoppers
These people like to try-on. Some spend hours in their dressing rooms instagramming friends. They take piles and piles of clothes into the dressing rooms that we then have to lug back to an area far away (or so it feels) so the clothes can be put back on the floor. These people typically leave with a thank you but nothing worked. 



The Commitment-Phobic
If (and this is a big IF) they purchase anything, they always ask, "What is your return policy?" They need an opinion from everyone. They waffle over every piece they are considering buying. And you just know that whatever they're buying is coming back. Because it's very likely that they will find a husband or friend or mother or daughter that thinks that what they did buy is too big, too tight, too similar to something else they own, not flattering, or too matronly.



The Holders
These are the people who ask, "Can you hold this for me until tomorrow?"  Even after spending much time trying the item or items on. The excuse given is usually lame. I didn't realize the time and I'm meeting someone for dinner. Or, I forgot that I have a coupon at home that I want to use. Or, my boyfriend is paying and he'll be in with me tomorrow. I don't understand this group. Either buy it and if you change your mind return it. Or don't buy it and go home and think about it. But asking an associate to Hold merchandise for more than a few hours requires a big effort. We need to ring it up as if it were a purchase. We need to put plastic around the clothes being held along with an uncharged receipt. We need to get a manager's approval. And we need to carry the items to a special area, and then remember to retrieve it if it's not sold. This would all be fine, except 99% of the time, the Hold-requester never comes back, despite pleas and promises to the contrary.


The You Belong To Me ones
These are rare but upsetting. This happens to me today. I have three customers I am helping at the same time and therefore can't be 100% available to any one. I can't, more specifically, fill the expectation of personal sherpa.


The Late Shoppers (the worst)
These are people who enter a dressing room, with arm-loads of clothes, minutes before the store is closing. I once stayed three hours after closing to help someone who was loving every single expensive piece she was trying on. I anticipated a big sale and stayed until 10pm on a Sunday night when I should have left at 7. In the end, she bought nothing. Another time I helped someone who was shopping late. This time I stayed two hours past my departure time, to finally ring up two small, on-sale items, that netted me $12. 



The Inconsiderates can and do make sales associates cry. It's hard not to feel bad about yourself when you are being treated with disdain.  Sure, we can rationalize and say, "I know it's not about me, it's about them," but their lack of respect stings. 

It's fortunate that most people fall into the Considerate category. It's the primary reason I do what I do. I believe that most people are nice. Do treat me with respect. And value my opinion and help. If it weren't that way, no store would have any sales associates at all.