bad beginning leads to great ending

So...

Remember my post about the laundry that came back dirty? And the final settlement of $600?

After I posted this story (in two blog posts), I get an email from a good friend. I'll call this person (who prefers anonymity) VGGF (as in, very generous good friend).

Like me, VGGF agrees that this small business did the right thing. They handled the problem exactly as it should have been handled. WIth apologies first. No excuses. Multiple attempts to re-clean the items. And in the end, a fair settlement.

It wouldn't have been unusual had this cleaners reacted differently —  especially during these very difficult COVID times when small businesses have experienced such a sharp decline in revenue.

My friend would like to recognize this cleaning business for doing the right thing. And so VGGF offers to send me a check for $600 so I can reimburse them.

At first, I say no.

I mean, after all, they did ruin my good sheets and a few other items. It wasn't their fault, but yet they were responsible. And how would I explain this, anyway? 

But a few days go by and I'm still thinking about my friend's generous offer. And I change my mind. 

If I can do a good deed and make someone happy, why not?

I write back to VGGF, telling this person I've changed my mind. And a few days later a $600 check arrives.

Today I go to the cleaners and Michelle, the owner, is there.

WIthout showing her the check, I tell her the story. Pretty much as I've relayed here, leaving out only the part about my initial response.

Then I hand her the check.

She looks at it.  Her hands go to her mouth. And her eyes fill with tears. She is totally overwhelmed with gratitude.

Her utter joy is infectious. It feels so good to be the bearer of nice news.

I ask Michelle if she'd like to make a video to thank my friend. She says yes. I hit record. She begins speaking and I get lost in her words. She is articulate and gracious. She speaks warmly and beautifully. It's about two minutes long and I can't wait to show my friend.

I get home and play the video back.

Yup. No video.

I guess I should stick to writing and not recording.

When I apologize to VGGF about the video the response I get is unexpected. "I'm glad it didn't work. I'd have been too embarrassed to watch it."

How lucky am I to have a person like that in my life?

an opinion on mask-wearing

I like rules. Not that I am particularly good at following them; I'm not. But I like knowing what the expectations are.

So now in my building, it's pretty much, do as you want regarding mask-wearing. Some doormen wear masks, others don't.

Most tenants wear masks. But there are those who will take our very small elevator unmasked. 

According to my building's management, "We can't enforce mask-wearing." They are a private business so I don't think that's true, but that's what they're saying. 

This morning I go to vote in the NYC primary.

I'm greeted at the door by a man whose mask is below his nose. To me, this is the worst possible decision. What does it even mean? I want to pretend to be wearing a mask but I don't really want to?

If you aren't going to wear a mask, then don't. But wearing one under your nose is just wrong. Plus, it looks stupid.

Some are still wearing masks.

While others don't have a mask anywhere on them.

And, the voters, too, are the same mix of totally masked to half-masked to no mask.

I don't know who is vaccinated and who isn't.

But the positivity rate in NYC is under 1% with over 70% being vaccinated, including me.

So I should feel safe. 

Yet still, I don't. At least not inside.

cleanin' out my proverbial closet

I am too much of a neat-freak to be a hoarder.  Though I do find throwing stuff out difficult. But I am trying to change.

Over the past few weeks, I've assigned myself the arduous task of cleaning out both my armoire and my file cabinet.

First, the armoire.

When I bought this antique piece in Bridgehampton many years ago, I loved it. 

I even had a local woodworker build in shelves and drawers. I of course filled everyone.

But my style has changed, and I now prefer sleek and modern. And, my room is too cluttered with this in it. I am trying to sell it on Craig's list, but so far, no reasonable offers. 

It takes me a few days to clean out the drawers and shelves. 

Really, why am I keeping the Upfront Discovery presentation from 1998, nice as it was?

Or the beautiful PR piece for As the World Turns?  The show has been off-air for over ten years.

And what about my boxes of Crane's stationery and matching envelopes for use when job search letters and resumes used to be mailed?

I even find a Black and Decker power scissors that I bought on Amazon in 2006. 

It is still unopened. I unwrap it, charge the battery, and it works. It's actually a great item. I bought the same for my friend M and she's been using hers now for fifteen years.

I even find a safety deposit key and discover I don't need a safety deposit box. When I go to the bank to see what I've been keeping inside it,  I find only one item. . That's $54/year I don't need to spend.

I do keep the many great notepads I have that are on heavy stock paper. I think my love of good paper may stem from my dad's early jobs in the paper business.  

The two drawer-file cabinet takes much much longer to go through. There are too many memories attached to some files.

All the report cards. Teacher notes. College applications. Test scores. Middle school essays. Some so poignant they make me cry. Meaningful letters. How can I toss these things? I can't and I don't.

Even the acrimonious letters between Alexander's dad and me from years ago I decide to hold on to.  Why? I have no idea.

But I do throw away my calendars going back to the 70's. 

I start to read through them. "I'm 32 and feeling lazy...".  These can be tossed.

Old insurance claims. Receipts to items I no longer have. Generic school information. Gone.

I finally come across this group of photos taken in June of 2016 at Saks. A flood of memories comes back, some good, some not. 

It takes courage the photo says. 

Yes. Emptying pieces of one's past definitely does.

dirty laundry: deal reached

So remember the laundry I brought in on May 5 and got it all back filthy?  Well, all is finally resolved.

It seems the problem was caused when a ventilation pipe that connects with the dryer backed up and all the accumulated dust inside the pipe exploded onto my clothes, instead of being re-circulated into the air.

I had the misfortune of being the one whose 21 pieces of laundry literally got dumped on. 

After two weeks, all but 7 pieces had been cleaned to a level I found acceptable. Michelle, the owner, asks if she can try again with the remaining 7 pieces. I say yes.

Two more weeks pass, and as promised, Michelle calls me today. 

We meet, an hour later, and her husband (whom I've never met) is with her. 

"Unfortunately," she tells me, "the remaining pieces can not be cleaned to the degree I find acceptable." 

I had itemized the cost to replace these remaining items, and it now totals $829.

The husband does the speaking. He begins, as she did several weeks ago, with many apologies.

But then, he veers into comments like....

We are a small business....

And you know how hard we tried to get all the laundry cleaned...

And things were particularly hard during COVID...

And this is a very unusual thing. In fact, in all my years of doing business this is the first time we've even seen a problem like this...

And we stayed open during the pandemic so we could service the neighborhood...

And we did go back and tried cleaning your items many many times...

I am listening, but all of this, while true, is irrelevant. 

And then finally, the husband asks, "Would you be willing to negotiate?"

"Yes, of course," I answer. "I'd much prefer that we settle this and not have to go to small claims court."

'Okay, good," he responds.

I wait, and no one says anything.

Finally I say, "What are you offering?"

I expect him to answer with some ridiculously low number. But he doesn't.

Instead, he surprises me and says, "$600."

I believe his offer is fair and reasonable. 

So with no hesitation I say, "I accept."

We don't shake hands (ya know, that COVID thing), but he does write me a check.

They thank me for my patience. I thank them for their efforts and reasonableness.

I might even have my next load of laundry done there.

After all, they did say, and I believe them, that they have never seen anything like this before. And they are next store which is very convenient.

It feels good to be done with this. 

And even better to have settled with friendly feelings on both sides.

back to celebrating

10 of us, all ex Horace Mann moms, have been celebrating each other's birthdays for too many years to remember.

We now all play Canasta.

And have shared many life events. 

Marriages. Deaths. Engagements. Political differences. Changing hair colors. And even a move across the country.

The last time we celebrated a birthday was Shari T's, in February 2020. 

And now, finally, we get together again. 

We are here for Ronda's birthday. It was supposed to be a dual celebration but unfortunately, Shari C could not attend.

A couple of other friends are unable to make it, but still, it's a great night.

We meet at Quality Bistro in midtown.

It's hot. And busy.

We are seated (by request) outside. 

Once the drinks arrive and the conversations start the heat seems to dissipate — replaced by the comfortable camaraderie of good friends getting together after a long long time.

family reunion, finally

Thanksgiving 2019. 

Over 18 months ago. 

That was the last time we all got together. 

But today, finally, that ends. 

We meet. 

Maskless. And with hugs. In Jason and Amanda's idyllic home.

Had Sally and Alexander been able to come, it would have been perfect.

And it all feels remarkably normal.

No conversation even includes mention of COVID, or vaccinations, or anything else that has dominated our lives for the past 15 months. 

Amanda is the best hostess. 

Although she gets a lot of help from 5-year old Chloe who loves offering to get everyone drinks. creating little appetizers, and making sure we are all seated comfortably. Chloe also tells me she likes my hair, "because it looks like a rainbow." The same reason (different words) why one of my sisters doesn't like it.

I meet some people I've never before met. Or, that I haven't seen in so long they've forgotten my name.  

There's the youngest, Charlotte, who is less than two months old.

And Jack, who was born last April.

And Henry who was Charlotte's age the last time I saw him.

Oh, and though I've met Chloe and Isabel numerous times, it's been so long they'd both forgotten my name. 

I also finally get to meet Dominik whom I'd only ever met on Zoom.

Jean and her family drive down from the Cape.

Joined by my mom.

Rita of course is also present.

There's plenty of amazing food.

Some swimming; it's over 90 degrees and hot.

Lots of picture posing, that no one seems to mind.

I can't say it's been worth the wait, as that implies the wait's been worth it. 

But like all families, 15 months of not getting together is just too long. But when it finally happens... it is oh so nice.