an accident

I'm out the door by 7am. It's Monday (December 19), my long-walk day.

With me is only my AirPods and iphone.

I'm listening to a crime podcast on Casefile, only a block or two from my apartment. And I walk right into this big pole in the middle of the sidewalk.

I fall to the ground, face down. The fall isn't what hurts me, and I don't lose consciousness. I put my hand over my face, and know I'm bleeding. I'm lying prone on the very cold sidewalk when some lovely woman sees me.

In a calm voice she says, "I'm going to call an ambulance. You are bleeding a lot. And I will stay with you til the ambulance comes." A saint, really. Meanwhile, poor Suri keeps asking over and over, "Do you need help?" I love my Apple Watch.

The ambulance comes. I am required to remove my hands from my face. I'm scared as I have no idea where the blood is coming from. The ambulance people tell me it's my nose, and I'm relieved.

But still, I don't look good.

The ER experience at Weill Cornell is awful. Since I'm not dying, I am mostly ignored. I have a CAT scan on my face and a CAT scan on my brain (required, I guess, after a fall). My brain is fine, my face, not so much. Two crushed bones in my nose. Abrasions all over. Deep cuts on my lip and nose. 

My good friend Shari  drops everything to come over. I know I'll be in the ER for a long time, and I at least need my glasses so I can use my phone. Judicially, though, as I don't have a backup charger.

I get stitches on the outside of my nose, and stitches on the inside and outside of my lip. I'm sent home around 5:30.

It could have been much worse. 

My son sends me flowers, which helps immensely.

The pain is minimal; the discomfort is great.

But within a week, I'm healing well. It's my mouth that bothers me the most. Eating and drinking is challenging. The stitches in my mouth are about an inch long and really annoying. Plus I have major scabbing under my top lip.

Tomorrow I am having what's called, a "closed nasal reduction surgery." It's only 15 minutes or so, though it's done in a hospital under general anesthesia. My doctor, Adam Jacoby, is well-credentialed and nice. I hope he's exceptionally competent too. My nose right now is not straight, and hopefully (no guarantee) this surgery will make it straight.

Otherwise, all is good.

two small coffee-related must-haves

I'll make this one short, since it's just a couple of recommendations.

I bought this Zojirushi insulated travel mug for the days I go into the office (although I now find myself using it at home).

It does two things, and those two things it does exceptionally well...better than any of the many others I've tried, including YETI, Contigo, and Swell.

It keeps hot beverages hot for a really really long time. And it doesn't leak. So far, it's perfect.

The other item I am now loving is this small desk vaccuum by IGOKOTI. I use it every morning to pick up all the small coffee grounds that lay sprinkled on my counter, after using my much-adored Baratza Encore Electric Grinder.

For $14, this tiny vacuum has made my morning routine a lot easier.

 

working and fasting

Today is Yom Kippur and I am fasting.

I always do. No food, no water, nothing.

But I do it more out of fear. Fear that if I don't, something terrible will happen.

I know this rationale is not a good one.

And, I work today. 

My fasting is probably canceled by my working on the day I should be atoning.

I know. This isn't at all the day's intent.

In late afternoon, I go to Fairway to buy some traditional food for my solo break-fast.

I decided not to join my family as I didn't want to leave work early, although I'm sure it would have been fine.

I'm at the Fairway deli counter, ordering. 

Lox. Creamed herring. Bagels. Cream cheese. And asking about the chopped liver.

That's when I see this adorable (albeit much younger) guy standing next to me. He asks for, and then samples, the chopped liver. He looks at me and says, "You should buy it. It's really good."

We start talking. He, too, is making a solo break-fast . And he too, is both working and fasting. 

"You're fasting?" I ask. "But you tried the chopped liver."

"Oh, no!!! I totally forgot," he says.  "I just tasted it on impulse. I am fasting."

Our banter continues. I feel young and flirty. It's a nice feeling.

But soon it's ruined.

I check out.

And while I'm walking home,  I look at my receipt, and see this.

How depressing! The $4.08 discount is hardly worth the reminder.

The cashier never even asked my age.

Hmmm.

Maybe this story would have had a different ending had I not both worked and fasted.

Addendum

So after I post the above, my friend Ellen texts me, 

As always. Laughing from you, but taking it a step further….: guilty about working on Yom Kippur but no guilt of buying shrimp and prosciutto to accompany your traditional break-fast food. Lol! L’shana Tova.

first three weeks

So, week one.

New programs to learn (everything is on Office) and I am used to all the Mac programs.

A million different sources.

A new computer (that I love, a 16 inch MacBook Pro that the tech experts hate, since most of the company uses a PC). But it still takes time to organize all the settings.

An office with an incredible view:

In fact, my office is so nice that I am one of a few who prefers going in to not. I like separating work from home, and the office is an easy commute.

The building is new and high tech. The security is great — no lobby directory. ID's that are programmed for individual floors.  You scan your card, and the turnstile has a scanner that tells you what elevator to take. And of course there are no floors listed in the elevator.

The area around the office is beautiful too. It's in Battery Park, a section of the city that's been entirely rebuilt since 9-11. Stores and restaurants are everywhere. As well as trees. Boats.  And a lot of water. I feel like I've left Manhattan.

Weeks two and now three feel a lot more comfortable.

I'm getting used to all the programs, though I still have a ways to go.

Everyone I've met so far is incredibly nice. Very helpful. And respectful.

And the best part? 

No messy dressing rooms, and zero returns.

why I hate my cable company

Four visits from a technician.

Two trips to the Spectrum store.

Multiple calls to Spectrum, varying in hold time from nine to 25 minutes.

Multiple calls to Spectrum with many many different people with every single one of them  giving me conflicting information.

And the outcome?

I turn in my DVR cable boxes and DVR service saving $35/month.

I cancel my HBO service and buy it instead directly though HBO, saving $100 for the year.

I add a DVR cloud service for $5/month (I record a lot).

The result?

The app loads slowly.

The interface is just okay.

And the DVR service doesn't work on my bedroom TV.

I call again and spend about an hour on the phone with the most senior level technical supervisor.

He has me signing in and out. Plugging and unplugging. All sorts of useless activities.

Still, it doesn't work. I schedule an appointment.

A technician comes to my house. While very nice, he says, "We only handle equipment problems. This is an app problem."

I call Spectrum. 

Twenty minutes later I reach someone, and ask immediately for a supervisor.

This time, I am lucky. 

I get Carlus. 

The only one in the entire company who happens to know Spectrum's cloud DVR service is not compatible with Samsung TV's made in 2016 (that's my bedroom TV, not my newer living room one). 

I guess this is a big secret at Spectrum that only Carlus has been told about.

Carlus is fantastic. And Derick the technician who has come to my house twice is too.

But they are only two people in a company of over 93,000.

Good luck sorting through all the misinformed and rude people to find the few hidden gems.

Addendum, only for those who care about getting rid of cable: 

I end up buying a great little ROKU for $40 and can now DVR shows in my bedroom. In addition, I can now watch Apple TV and DIscovery Plus which I couldn't before because my 2016 Samsung Smart TV was, I guess, not smart enough. 

I also buy a digital antenna so I can get NBC, CBS, ABC etc. with the hope of saying a complete goodbye to cable. The set up is easy. But, I don't like the interface and it's far too unwieldy, so I return it.

But just by doing the things I did do, I cut my cable bill by $50/month without much of a compromise.

So yes, it is worth it. But the process is a big pain, unless you have a better cable company than I do.

at long last... big news

I got a job. A real one!

No more getting up at 4am to travel through a dark city and then sit around for hours and hours hoping for a sliver of an on-screen appearance.

In a million years I never thought that this very blog might lead to a job, but it has.

Someone reading it — someone I had met once and hadn't seen in over 30 years — thought of me for a job they knew was open.

They contacted me through Facebook Messenger at the beginning of August.

And then, over the course of the next few weeks, I spoke via Zoom to four key people at the company. 

I start tomorrow.

It's a full-time job. I'm Director, Office of the CEO.

The company is Cumulus Media;  it's the third largest owner and operator of radio stations in the US, with corporate headquarters in NYC and Atlanta.

But mostly I'll be working remotely. 

I couldn't be more thrilled.

rainbows and roses and whiskers on kittens...

Every now and then, and always unexpectedly, someone will tell me that they bought something I had recommended and how much they, too, love it.

Inspired by this bit, here's a short list of a few favorite things.

Dyson V7 Motorhead Vacuum

I live in a relatively small NYC apartment and hate to vacuum. I love to organize, not to clean. And vacuuming is such a chore. Even my small Miele is heavy.  And then there is the plugging and unplugging.  But this little Dyson is great. Maybe not for a big house, but perfect for a small apartment.  It's light, easy to use, holds a charge, does a very good job, and makes vacuuming regularly something I now do.

The Cheese Knife OKP2

Not much to say about this knife, except it does what it's supposed to do, and does it flawlessly.

Twelve South Forte for iPhone | Modern Desktop Stand for MagSafe Charger and iPhone

This is something you might not think you want or need, but once you have it, you'll love it. It both holds and charges your iPhone. I love the aesthetic and its ease of use. And, it has a very small footprint. Another plus.

Baratza Encore Burr Coffee Grinder

Never used to care that much about coffee. But that changed when I was at a friend's house and they had one of these coffee grinders. It does make a difference. This coffee grinder is fast, consistent, and makes your first cup of the day something worth getting up for. The one minor issue is the spray of little coffee grinds that always end up on my counter.

Breville Die-Cast 2-Slice Smart Toaster

Easy, fluid adjustments from light to dark. Not too much to say. Just think this small toaster is great, if you need one.

Sowaca Ceramic Cooking Pan

If you live alone, or frequently cook for one, this pan is great. I use it all the time to heat things up. Easy to clean. Just the right size for most things. Comes in a few colors. And oh so adorable.

Then there's this app called...

Too good to go

I'm not sure how useful it is if you don't live in or near a big city, but if you do, it's a great little app to know about.

Contigo Ashland Chill 2.0 Water Bottle with Autospout Lid

Have tried many many water bottles and this, I think, is the best. It really keeps water cold  (and ice cubes frozen, for over 24 hours). I also like the silicone sipping spout. You just need to drink from the bottle while it's held vertically.

And finally, if you don't have an ice maker in your refrigerator and you buy ice...

Manual Ice Crusher

I don't drink often but I like an occasional Cosmopolitan with a friend. I buy a bag of ice and really have no way to crush the ice. So I purchase this little set on Amazon. It's now been ages since I've made a Cosmo, but I do need ice cubes. The big bag of ice I bought a while ago has basically morphed into one big block of ice.  (As a side note, I recently learned that bought ice should always have the IPIA label). Last night I try the small mallet above and use it on the bag of ice. One small smash and I have tons of ice cubes. Perfect to add to my Contigo above.

Yup.  Even small things in life can make me happy.

if you ever think you're having a bad day...

 I meet Gail in 1981. 

She is my first boss after graduating from business school. 

Although younger than I am by a few years, Gail has already been at Gillette for three years when I arrive. 

She is the one who teaches me how to write. How to rationally structure arguments. How to maneuver around corporate politics. 

She is a great mentor who also happens to be very smart. Supportive. And kind.

I leave Gillette in 1984 and don't see or speak to Gail until we reconnect via LinkedIn. It is then we discover that we both live in NYC. 

We meet for dinner in February 2011. We haven't seen each other in 27 years so we have a lot to catch up on. 

In short, Gail is now married to Greg, a brilliant Harvard-educated doctor.  She's held various senior executive positions at major cosmetic companies. And she is still tall and glamorous, with luxurious skin and hair — just as she's always had. 

Over the years, we don't see each other often but are always in touch.

Then, the day before Thanksgiving of last year, I get this text from Gail:

Gail is not an alarmist. Neither is she a complainer. Her disposition is sunny. Bright and sunny. She barely recognizes clouds. And if she does, they go unacknowledged.

I call her right away. It turns out to be a tumor at the base of her tongue caused by the HPV virus. The prognosis is excellent; the treatment (chemo and radiation) is dreadful.

Exactly three days later Gail calls crying. "Greg just died." Greg has had many medical issues but his death is sudden and unexpected.

Then...

In preparation for her grueling, two-month treatment, Gail goes through a series of tests, including a head-to-toe PET scan. It is then they discover a brain tumor. Totally unrelated to her tongue cancer.

Can you imagine?

Through it all Gail never complains. Her spirits remain high and her humor is always intact. I honestly don't have the words to describe my admiration for the dignity and grace Gail shows throughout this personal and medical nightmare.

Never do I have a conversation with Gail that she doesn't:  Ask how I am. How my son is. And tell me again how much she appreciates whatever small thing I may have done to support her.

Gail finishes her chemo/radiation treatment in April.

She has her brain surgery two weeks ago (successful and benign).

Today she is told her healing is "perfect."

She is in better health than anyone I know, having had every inch of her body poked and prodded and examined and treated.

She is now on her way to a complete recovery. 

And her hair, and everything else about her, is still luxurious and beautiful.

all right mr. de mille, I'm ready for my close-up

So as a background actor there is a range of on-camera visibility — from zero to recognizable.

In early May I go to Park Slope in Brooklyn. 

Call time is 7pm.

I  debate going at all as I don't usually do night shoots. But I'm told, "It's only one scene. It'll probably wrap early."

It doesn't.

I arrive around 6:45pm to learn they haven't finished shooting scenes from the day.

We don't get on set until midnight.

Then there are endless cut, reset, and action commands. 

I get home around 2am.

But hey, becoming a star requires flexibility. Hollywood doesn't have normal working hours. 

This was for a new TV series on Hulu called Everything's Trash.  It premiered July 13 to very good reviews.

Yesterday I go back and fast-forward through the seven episodes that are now streaming hoping to find me. 

I don't.  

I decide to try again.

This time I fast-forward more slowly. Scene by scene.

And then, at the very end of episode three,  I find me. 

So exciting. I now have a real chance at being discovered.

a short trip up to the cape

Robin picks me up a little after 7 on Friday morning and we drive up to the Cape, where we stay until yesterday. 

Despite the gorgeous beach, nice weather, and good local food, Robin is fascinated most by the golf carts that transport everyone around the area where my mom lives. It's the way most people get to the private beach that makes WIld Harbor so special.

My mom has had a bad case of bronchitis that has lasted over a month. So while I usually go up to the Cape for a few weeks each summer, this is my first (and likely only) time up this year.

The weather is great. The scorching heat has finally abated. 

As per usual, I:

• Eat my annual serving of fried clams at Crabapples.
• Spend hours sitting (and reading) and sunning on Wild Harbor Beach. 

• Pick up daily sandwiches at either Dean's or Westside Market.
• Stop by my good friend M's just as the sun is setting. And, 

• Visit Mashpee Commons, specifically to buy the wonderful Traditional Balsamic at The Little Shop.

One night we all have dinner at M's new house on the water. And again we are treated to the majestic setting sun. 

Jean comes with Jim and Sally and one of her creative and beautiful salads.

It's a perfect summer's night, replete with good conversation and many laughs.

On our last day, Robin and I go to the beach, despite it being a slightly overcast day.

We are entertained by this woman who doesn't know beach etiquette.

We are on a near-empty beach.

and this woman plops her chair almost on top of ours.

It's like sitting in a near-empty movie theater and having someone sit down in the seat next to yours. 

The time on the Cape goes by quickly. 

It'll probably be a while before I'm back doing this.

Or seeing my mom's beautiful smile.

fake arrest

I like the concept of getting these background jobs better than the reality of doing them.

The other day I applied and was excepted, to play a perp in a squad room — much more interesting than being a pedestrian.

I am given these guidelines for wardrobing:

PERPS: Please bring your best “down and out” look - distressed or old/worn clothing works best - think of character types (i.e. drunk, gang member, thug, homeless person, drug addict, prostitute, sex worker, etc.) - jeans with holes, baggy jeans or pants, sweatpants, mesh shorts, cargo shorts, oversized t-shirts, graphic t-shirts as a layering piece, plaid shirts, light hoodies, denim jackets, bomber jackets, plain baseball caps or knit caps (no logos or graphics please) - when in doubt bring something dark or black - color is ok, just no white or light/bright colors.  NO BLUE!

Well, clearly I'm not playing a prostitute. The stilettos  I'd have to wear would be too uncomfortable. (That, and a few other reasons).

So I make up my own backstory. I'll be a lowlife who commits a robbery with a knife. 

I go through my closet and realize that in the past two years, I've donated or sold most everything I don't like or need. In other words, I don't have anything that is really appropriate for the part.

This is the best I can come up with.

Jeans with holes in them and a flannel shirt that of course happens to be blue.

The shoot is in a place called Canarsie Brooklyn. Upon arriving I see this on the street and think it's part of the set.

It's not.

Someone else walks by a large dead black cat with both its eyes and mouth open. On the sidewalk. Nearby.

Justin, the very nice wardrobe guy, looks at me and agrees that my clothes are too nice.

He fits me in an oversized pair of corduroy pull-on pants, a man's very large flannel shirt, and a tank top. All in colors I'd never buy. 

I wash my hair this morning and just let it go. Pretty much the way I wear it most days,  The hair person looks at me and says, "Your hair is perfect." I'm not sure if I should feel bad or good.

 

I'm the only female perp. The other four are all males.

It's about 100 degrees today (literally). My clothes are perfect for a cold winter's day. And the set has no AC.

I'm the one who gets to do the perp walk through the station. 

Hands handcuffed behind my back and looking sad, chunky, unkempt, and overall awful. 

Around 4, I am told I can leave. 

One of the assistants tells me that I've been seen a lot on camera, so they're able to dismiss me early.

I'm back home by 5:30, totally exhausted by the heat. But happy to be in my own cool clothes.

lost

The weather's been brutal.

Over 90, day after day.

I'm working on the TV show Succession this week — as an upscale NY society type on a yacht somewhere.

So today I need to go to Astoria Queens for a COVID test.   It's a borough I know as well as Bejing. 

I leave early, 7:45.

I  take the R train; exit at my stop, and enter a foreign land.

I look at Google Maps, expecting to see directions leading me to a nearby Kauffman Studios.

Instead, I see that it'll take me 1 hr and 43 minutes to walk the 5 plus miles to arrive at my destination.

F**K!!!!!!!

Last night when I was looking at the directions, I noted that I needed to take the R train headed in the direction of Forest Hills Queens/71st St. 

This morning I make the mistake of actually taking the subway all the way to Forest Hills Queens/71st St. It's the very last stop. Not the three stops it should have been.

I have no idea where I am.

So I get back on the subway. 

And then I hear a disturbing message I've never heard before on any subway.

"This train is being diverted off its regular route."

F**K!  F**K!  F**K!

Now I'm really lost.

I eventually find some helpful people and make it onto another subway, exiting at a stop I never knew existed.

Then I take a bus. 

I start to ask the driver a question to double-check I'm going in the right direction and she says, "You need to pay before I can answer your question." 

At first I think she's joking. She's not.

Finally I arrive.

Two hours after leaving home.

The COVID test takes about 15 seconds.

The ride back is as it should be ... home in thirty minutes.

Addendum: 

After turning down another job, and after figuring out how to get to the set tomorrow and what wardrobe to bring, I get this email around 6 tonight. 

Hi there,

You are receiving this email because you have been booked to work tomorrow Friday 8/5 on Succession.

Due to a change in numbers based on the scenes filming tomorrow and filming ahead of schedule, you will no longer be needed for work.

Production will pay you a half day's check for the inconvenience, plus your stipend for the COVID test.

Oh well. I guess that's show biz. 

Plus next week I'm playing a perp in a squad room for another show. Perfect. Sneakers, and little makeup. From a socialite to an addict... I have a very big range. 

a week on set

I get a one-week job for an Emmy-winning TV show whose name I cannot reveal.

Before I even arrive on set, I have two separate appointments in Brooklyn. One for a COVID PCR test. Then the next day for another COVID test and a fitting. Then two more COVID tests later in the week. 

The shoot begins Monday at 6:42 am and will continue all week.

I am first sent to wardrobe. Everything is pressed and organized.

Next I go to hair. I come out looking like Nancy Reagan. (The scene is from decades ago). I could be caught in a tornado and my hair wouldn't move.

Then makeup, where I fall in love with the artist who will be recreating me this week.

Three hours after arriving I'm ready.

The day is long. 14 hours.

I am paid $237. A  SAG background person gets paid $460 for the same hours, same work. I'd love to be union but it's hard to get in.

I do this for four days.

One day we get in at 8:12 (odd call times) and are not on set until about 5.

One night I forget my wallet, earrings, and driver's license.

Another night I buy a sandwich on my way home at 9:30 then forget to take it with me.

My mind is barely functioning by the time the day ends.

But...

It is the most organized, buttoned-up show I've worked. The seasoned director creates an easygoing atmosphere; his professionalism is always apparent, as well as his calm and humorous demeanor.

The crew makes it a point to mention how important the background actors are, and how much our work is appreciated.

It may be a small gesture, but it's an important one. 

Mostly, though, we sit around and wait.

But I end up talking to some very nice, funny and interesting people from all different backgrounds. An ex-music exec. More than one teacher. An editor. A police firearms instructor. An elite runner. A cantor. A Broadway dancer. An ex-female bodybuilder. And more.

And it's an overall good-looking group. It's hard not to be intimated by some of the gorgeous people playing background.

The work is mostly boring. Sitting all dressed up looking exactly the same, every day, and listening to the same dialogue repeated over and over.

Still... it's hard not to be enthralled with the glamour of Hollywood glitz.