toe story

The alcohol, Advil, and overall high from last night no longer mask the constant throbbing in my big toe.

More than the pain, I need to be able to walk next week.  My mom and sister are coming to town for three days of celebrating my mom's 85th birthday.

I do a search to discover I have subungal hematoma —bleeding under the nail — resulting from an injury.  According to WebMD, this can cause symptoms “such as intense pain and throbbing.”  Options for relief include two at-home remedies.  One involves burning a pin through my nail and the other involves a drill bit.  YouTube videos provide the step-by-step instructions.  Really.  Who would do this?

I choose instead to see a trained expert, skilled in the art of drilling and burning.

As I’m leaving my building, I see Robyn.  Without my asking, she comes with me to City MD Urgent Care, as if this is something she would love to do.  Now that is really being a good friend.

The place is great.  Clean, friendly, fast and efficient.

Within twenty minutes of arriving, I am given a room.  Robyn comes in too.  The doctor tells me that she (the doctor, not Robyn) can drill a whole in my nail to relieve the pressure. But she also tells me there is no guarantee this will work, since she has no way of knowing if the blood has clotted or not, as it's been over 30 hours since the door slammed on my toe.

So I have two choices:

1. Do nothing and let the bleeding subside on its own.  More days of pain and hobbling. 

2. Have the doctor drill the hole and if it works, great.  And if not, the only downside, as far as I can see, is that I won't be able to have my right big toenail polished until I no longer have a hole in it, maybe six months. 

I figure it's worth trying.

Dr. Love (a nice name for a doctor) then takes out an instrument I don't see, as my eyes are squeezed shut.  I know this will not be pleasant. Robyn keeps talking to distract me.  I try to think pleasant thoughts.  Wow.  This is fine.  Barely hurts. And then wham! Excruciating pain. 

The doctor adds pressure to the nail (more pain) and is pleased that the blood hasn’t clotted.  This is good news.  When she is done, she wraps my toe in decorative tape, and I’m good to go.

The end.