"this kind of thing upsets me"

Although Alexander would surely disagree, I am doing a fairly decent job of saying nothing when...

• I wake up in the morning and see the greasy remnants of the Cuisinart Griddler still open on the counter.

• Alexander walks through the door at 3 a.m. 

• There are half empty glasses in more than one spot in the living room.

• His laundry basket is overflowing.

• The clothes he promised to take to the tailor's last week are still lying around his room.

• Toothpaste is all over the bathroom sink.

But yesterday morning...

I am loading the dishwasher in the kitchen and Alexander is in the living room watching Seinfeld on his computer.  I yell out, "Hey, are there any dishes in there?" "No," he responds automatically, as if programmed.

I turn the dishwasher on and walk into the living room, where I see a recently used plate.

"Really? You couldn't bother looking up from your computer to answer me when I asked if there were any dirty dishes near you? This is exactly the kind of thing that upsets me."

Alexander doesn't apologize. He offers no excuse. Instead he says, "I don't understand why you get so angry.  Calm down." He utters these final words intentionally as he knows how much I detest them.

Then he goes back to Jerry and friends, totally unaffected.

This afternoon I find Alexander in the kitchen making his lunch.  "Hey, I was going to make tuna," I say. "Ya know, this is exactly the kind of thing that upsets me. I need to be fed every three hours. It's your job as my mother to keep track of when I eat. I should never have to cook for myself."

He does make me laugh. Still, I'm sure he'd love it if my schedule revolved 100% around his —on call when he wants, disappeared otherwise.