I have a little story to tell. And though I know the end, I won't tell you just yet.
The posts that follow are written in real time, as the story unfolds.
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A good friend of mine calls around four.
"Hey, do you want to be on TV?"
Of, course, I've always wanted to be on TV, or in the movies.
Well, a friend of her son, has a sister, who's a producer and is working on a project about dating. "Can she call you?"
"Sure,"I answer with no hesitation. Even though I barely date.
So the sister calls. We talk for a few minutes. The show has been greenlit by a major studio. She asks if I'll have a skype interview with a casting person representing the production company. I'm a little shy, and hate skype, but hey, why not? I'll interview and see what happens. We set up the call for 7:15.
I have two hours to get ready. I put on some makeup. Throw on a black leather jacket over a white top, and download skype. I'm already nervous.
A young and vibrant producer I'll call Barbie calls. She gives me a little background and we begin. I think I spill too much. But after most comments, Barbie exuberantly responds, "Awesome." Or, "That's great." I hope I'm doing well. And gee, I hope I didn't disappoint when she asks if I have any tattoos and I have to say no.
Barbie asks me if I have any deal breakers in men I meet. I hadn't really been thinking about dating so I wasn't prepared for the question. And my answers sound stupid, even to me.
"I don't want anyone who has bad grammar." Why didn't I just say I want someone who is educated?
"They can't be sick." I mean really, couldn't I have just said, "I want someone who lives a healthy lifestyle?" It's not like I'm going to be matched (If I'm chosen) with someone who needs an oxygen tank to breathe.
"They can't be fat."
"No comb-overs."
"No smokers."
"I'm lucky. I have a lot of very smart, funny, accomplished, friends. I'd like to date a male version of them."
"Oh, and they have to be financially secure. I don't want anyone poor."
"And I'd prefer if they lived in the city."
"And Jewish would be nice, but not required."
By the time I'm done with my list, it's no wonder I don't date.
The call ends after about 45 minutes. I think it went well, but now I have to wait and see.
If Barbie thinks I qualify, (and that's a big if), she'll submit my skype tape to the production company and then they will decide if they want to interview me.
After we hang up, Barbie asks for 15-20 pictures. I don't have 15-20 pictures to send.
I look through the ones I have and see tons of me when I was using efudex and my face looked monstrous. Or all the ones I have when my face was healing from mohs surgery.
But I have almost no solo pictures from the last few months. So I find a few with me and other people. Cut them out and send Barbie five photos.
Now I'm just waiting to hear back. Just like after a date that I think went well. But did it?
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