just a little bit off

I think my mom should offer a little instruction book to her guests. Here are a few recommendations she might want to consider.

WHEN IN THE KITCHEN...

The cold water faucet on the right dispenses hot water. And conversely, you'll get cold water through the hot water faucet on the left.

WHEN IN THE UPSTAIRS BATHROOM...

Don’t be alarmed if the toilet handle to flush is difficult to push down.  Depress it half way for most of your flushing needs.  Hold the handle down for a few more seconds for more complicated ventures.

WHEN IN THE BACK BEDROOM... 
You may be tempted to use the light switch on your right when you walk in the room. Don't. It doesn't work. Hasn't for as long as I can remember. If you need light, just switch on the bedside lamp. 

WHEN IRONING... (laundry is included in all stays but ironing is not)
The ironing board and associated plug are near the washing machine and dryer. But if you use the wall plug, you need to first remember to flip up the light switch near the stairs.

WHEN DRIVING MY CAR INTO THE GARAGE... (Car usage is generously included in stay)
The right door on the garage doesn’t shut when you use the automatic garage closer; only the right side works. Don't ask why; I have no idea. To close the right side, enter the house and use the clicker near the door.

ALSO WHEN DRIVING MY CAR...
Don’t idly sit in it.  If you do, the transmission can automatically lock. Just leave the door open a little and you should be fine. I recently had to call a cab to get to my destination after the car refused to start.

But maybe it's not just my mom's beautiful home that has its quirks.

I drive to the local cheese shop today, and am greeted with this sign:

I tell the owners. “Hey, do you know you’re sign is upside down?”

“Ya; we know. But the sign on the other side is correct."

Hard not to love a place that's so endearing.