this october weekend

Making plans to see someone is complicated in today's world.

But it is doable.

Alexander and I finally solidify a plan for him to visit (from Phila) this weekend. I last saw him around Christmas time. Far too long ago.

He was supposed to come in mid-March for my birthday, but then we all know what happened then.

Neither one of us want to risk a long ride on public transportation so that's out.

But then my son buys a car at the end of July.

Finally, he can come stay with me.

Except now he's become very busy at work so we need to wait.

Then I go to the Cape for a couple of weeks in early September to visit my mom whom I hadn't seen since Thanksgiving.

At the same time, Alexander unexpectedly decides to vacation in Arizona and California.

After his return, my son needs to prepare for a test to get his real estate appraiser's license.

So the plan is to get together sometime after the October 8th test. I don't want him coming with a big test looming.

We decide on this weekend.

I ask him to get tested, and he asks if I'll get tested too.

Though I'm sure I'm much more careful than he is, what's fair is fair.

Early this week Alexander calls to tell me he is worried about giving me COVID (even if he tests negative, which he expects to) since his roommates are not all that careful.

He even suggests his staying in a hotel.

I think that's ridiculous but am willing to comply with whatever he wants just to see him. I advise him to please be careful after getting tested.

Alexander is supposed to get his results today, Friday; I get mine on Monday and all is good.

I make a mental list of things we can do, shows we can watch, and food we can eat.

Last night he calls.

He tells me that he went out one night — and without going into the details, now I am concerned that his (deliberate) behavior may put both of us at risk.

Living alone, I do not want to be sick. I wouldn't anyway, but living alone would make it even more frightening.

So now Alexander is not coming this weekend. He is willing, but I am not. 

I am disappointed, angry and sad.

In the big scheme of things there are many upsets worse than this one. 

I do get that.

But I miss my son.

Zoom is good for a lot of things, but it can't replace that in-person hug.